Welp, the title basically conveys the “big” announcement. Surprise! I’m having a baby!
Some close friends and family may have been waiting for when that day would come, and for others the pregnancy may come as a shock. But as for me, I was both wondering when and if I would conceive, yet it came as a shock to me when I got the news that I was pregnant. There were a few reasons why, and I will candidly share them with you.
*Not interested in The Transitional story? Skip by clicking My Pregnancy Story Week-by-Week.
In many ways I was not ready – mentally, emotionally, and financially. I’ve been selective in my choice of men to become intimate with and never really was the type to be promiscuous; it never really appealed to me to get a possible lifetime sentence with a Sexually Transmitted Disease (STD) for a brief moment of pleasure, no matter how much or how little we liked each other. I took precautions and sometimes extra precautions for safe sex and to ensure the unexpected doesn’t become expected. I’ve also told myself at a young age that I would want to be married before I have any children, and I remain to value that decision. I value it for many reasons – one is because it sanctifies a bond of commitment, and secondly in society today, there is less co-parenting and more one-parenting due to domestic abuse and uncommitted fathers/fathers-to-be (and sometimes mothers).
In April 2016, one and half years ago, I was told I was already in perimenopause. Perimenopause can cause hormonal changes, an irregular menstrual cycle, fertility problems, along with other possible symptoms. I knew by being in my mid-30s it could play a risk factor in infertility or the possibility of having a difficult pregnancy, too. So, when I received the news that I am perimenopausal, accounting for my age, and not being traditionally married yet, I accepted my fate of possibly being childless as time ticked on. At the time of acceptance I wasn’t sure if I wanted children anyway. I took it as “if God wants that for me He will provide,” but if not I accepted that as well. And I came to my own conclusion that if my husband and I decide to have children down the road, we can always adopt.
And from there the rest is history! I am a true testament that the impossible can be possible with the odds I had! That science behind effective contraceptives and reproductive decline can only go so far . . . and then there comes God. Although I couldn’t fully understand His will, and understand the likelihood for some weeks that I was pregnant, I simply couldn’t deny God’s gift. If I did, I’d feel like I’m denying Him. I consider it now to be a blessing. The initial shock is over. I’m now nervous and excited for what’s to come. There are hurdles to go over, kinks to straighten out, and those annoying thorns still in my side, but no matter the circumstances or the negativity that may linger, there is as much to be positive and thankful for.
Please click My Pregnancy Story Week-by-Week to hear the story unfold and photos to view.