For all the evils I have encountered in this world,
For all the influences it can have,
Has not destroyed me, but is willing to
In the emptiness of my laughs.
For the pain and the sorrows of this world is never-ending,
And it’s deep-throating its way into our lives
Through foolish myriads of the perfect storms*
Of living, when it only makes us die.
But I can escape the torturous beast within me,
I can rise up from the depths of hell.
It doesn’t have hold of my soul,
I just don’t see it ‘cause I’m not yet well.
Fighting with it is not the answer,
Lying to myself is even worse.
I can break the chains of my enslavement to it
Not accepting it as a perpetual curse.
Step-by-step it will take.
My mind swings like a pendulum for hours,
But I go through it ‘cause I know what’s at stake.
Life, love and happiness
It’s time for me to stop being fake.
Stand albeit alone if I have to
So I don’t make the greatest mistake.**
Then light a beauty shines ever so softly
Dim at first but it starts to become clear.
The frozen times I remembered
Are now breathing life into my forgotten years.
My will is stronger than I imagined
I was beaten down to think less than I am.
But I know better than that now,
Today, I became alive – I give a damn!
Tomorrow is another day
The evils around me are still there.
But I choose to look the other way
I must give myself a chance to care.
In the moment of all that is
And in all the moments that are going to be,
The evils will be behind me
But I must first take that leap.
*Perfect Storm: anything tempting such as a particular addiction
© Angela J Thomas 2015